As the header would suggest, yes, I am 32 weeks pregnant now. And as we start sliding into the home stretch I am overwhelmed with excitement and fear. More so than with my first. I am more excited because now I know what kind of love is waiting for me on the other side of that due date and I can not wait to experience it. Yet, I am more afraid now that labor is no longer a mystery. I am well aware of the very real pain i’m going to be experiencing in just a few more weeks. And the very real and tough first weeks of recovery with a newborn.
I also feel a sense of anxiety hanging over me now that seems to get a little stronger the further I get into this pregnancy. The check ups that were exciting a few weeks ago are now starting to make me a little nervous. Which is probably why I am up writing this at 1 am (I have an appointment with my OB early in the morning).
So, most nights, instead of getting rest I am stuck daydreaming about what our little girl will look like and making one To Do list after another in my head. I am, more than anything, grateful that I have a retreat from all of this stress, excitement and anxiety in the Lord. And it is my biggest hope for these two children that they will one day grow to know and have that same peaceful shelter in their times of worry and joy.
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”